RE: A Murmuring of Starlings
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I have come back from time to time to revisit, rework, and re-edit
The story has the mark of a patient and careful writer. You have lived with this story, which probably why the characters come to life under your guidance.
The ending changed half a dozen times over the past month alone.
My son used to tell me, when I wrote stories (I do so rarely now), that I should leave it alone, that I was teasing the story to death. But you can't say that to a writer. Until it feels 'right' it's not done.
To me, this story is definitely done. But I'm not in your head, I haven't lived with it. I don't think you should follow the man to the children's house. I don't think you should let us see the children as they receive his acceptance. I think what you have done, leaving a message, is perfect.
Sentimental? No. It is full of sentiment. Not the same thing. It took me a while to realize the family was dead, but that's the point, isn't it? The house is pregnant with memory. Now, with the invitation from the two children, perhaps he is ready to start living in the present. At least for Christmas day.
A really well-written story that shows craft.🌺
Thank you for your kind and considered feedback, my lovely. Your words are very encouraging to me. It makes me feel that I am at least on the right path!
👆 THIS!
Although, I understand what your son was saying. I have been told on several occasions that I should not seek to be such a perfectionist with my pieces. That it is better to write regularly and keep hitting the publish button. I struggle with that so much! Some nights I open my laptop and simply reread what I wrote the few days before and apply another edit. I may do a partial rewrite with fresh eyes. The story may not progress in terms of plot, but it progresses in terms of tightening the narrative, adding foreshadowing, doing more research, etc. I always edit as I go. It's just my process lol. I think I enjoy the research and editing aspects as much as the initial write 😂
Thank you for taking the time to read my story. I appreciate you 💗💗
Absolutely. For me, the first write is a draft. The rest of it, the editing, is when the story is carved into shape. It is the editing where the subtlety of expression, my voice, resides. This is my argument against AI. I don't want it deciding the very best way to say what I want to say.
So, I agree with your process, it's just that I don't have the patience to work on a long piece anymore. I envy you that. Also, I have become so fond of economy that I cut, cut, cut until my stories are down to bare nubs :)))