Are Happier Times Just an Illusion?

Whether it's due to my particular frame of mind at the moment, or due to the fact that there actually is a trend, it seems like I have run across the phrase "in happier times" quite a lot recently.

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What's That Mean?

It prompted me to pause for a moment to consider whether this idea that we had "happier times" at some unspecified point in our pasts is really more of an illusion than an actual reality.

I have no doubt that there are definitely people out there who have had happier times in their past because they're going through something particularly traumatic at the moment. That's not in question.

What I'm thinking about here are the many situations in which it seems like people are looking to the past and declaring it "happier," mostly as a result of the "Rose Colored Glasses of Passing Time" we invariably end up wearing because our memories of something that happened long ago aren't as sharp as they once were.

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As somebody who is often given to daydreaming, I know that when I think back to something that seemed like "happier times," I am usually just distracting myself. And, most of the time, I'm remembering specific events in the past that definitely were happy but that doesn't mean that the entire period back then was really any happier than the current day. It's just the one event that stands out.

That said, I have little doubt that the fact that more people seem to be looking back fondly to times in the past speaks rather loudly to the fact that overall life is pretty difficult for many folks, these days. And, perhaps, we all need a bit of a break from working our fingers to the bone everyday merely to make sure the electricity stays turned on.

But what are we really talking about when we think about happier times?

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For me, I can invariably trace it back to a wish for fewer responsibilities and less debt! But that's really just a part of being an adult, isn't it? When we're kids we have very few responsibilities and it seems like a carefree time when we look back from 20, 30, 40, 50 years hence.

Of course, I'm not suggesting there is anything wrong with having "Golden Memories" of the past. I have lots of fond memories of the past, but I try to not confuse them with being so much happier than the present that I start thinking of the present as loathsome and something I want to get away from.

Because it really isn't!

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Created at 2024-02-28 01:32 PST

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I remember when I was on rack for "the American dream." I had graduated with a degree and no debt. I had a place of my own. I had a job with what looked like a glowing future. Those were happier times. And then it all crumbled around me. I don't feel like I've been on anything resembling a path to success since 2008. I've been making the best of bad situations since. Even now, while I like most aspects of my job, it doesn't really offer enough hours or enough pay for me to make another go at independence. "Just get another job," people say, but with my health issues, this takes every bit of energy I have. It doesn't suck, but it still drains me. Happier times were real, especially when everything feels like a struggle just to stay afloat now.

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I can totally empathize with that. I suppose there are people out there for whom life turns out (more or less) as they had hoped/expected, and maybe that's the proverbial "carrot" that has somehow helped the rest of us continue in our own quests.

I'm sure I could have created the stereotypical path of success... had I not decided to actually do that "stupid" thing of thinking for myself, rather than blindly follow the groupthink version of what one should strive for in life.

Everything comes with a "price;" there's something we might wish for, but we have to forego something else to get it... even if just in the form of choices we make.

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Once upon a time there were happy times, especially when we were young and had very few responsibilities, our parents guaranteed us everything and all we had to do was study. Then life became more complicated, marriage, children and all that follows. I don't think there is such a thing as absolute happiness. But we tried to have it for a while. For everyone today life is very difficult and that tarnishes happiness. It got me thinking about your post, interesting. Thanks for sharing. Happy Wednesday.🤗🤗

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Yes, there were certainly aspects of life that were easier, in childhood, and perhaps our teenage years. Life now is very "complicated," as you suggest... and perhaps we fall into the trap of taking on more things that are actually wise to attempt. These days, I am trying to get to a point of less, rather than more, so I better can have time to "just BE."

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Having golden memories of the past actually helps to have a positive hope about the future
Well, that is how it happens to me though

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Yes, I would agree that those memories at least serve to help us stay positive in the now, regardless of whether the memories are accurate, or not.

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And, most of the time, I'm remembering specific events in the past that definitely were happy but that doesn't mean that the entire period back then was really any happier than the current day. It's just the one event that stands out.

Yep, that's right. It's always only and exclusively "one event" that stands out. People tend to forget that time, a whole life or whatever... are nothing more than a succession of different isolated moments without any particular continuity. Random happy events that have been captured over time as a simple photograph or screenshot at a given moment and stored in our memory.

But no more than specific situations at the end of the day, which if you analyze them well and subject them to review under greater and deeper scrutiny. You would realize what they really are and have been and most likely you would not decide to return and live them again if that means giving up the current situation you have reached and the position in which you find yourself today.

By that I mean. That at least me. Although I have also thought about this a few times. I usually conclude that I would not want to return to any of those happy moments in my life again. And having to start all over again from there. If that meant arriving at any other place or situation than the one I find myself in today.

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