Weekend Engagement - My Darkest Fears

I always feel that fears are something personal yet interesting - it's personal because the origin of the fear could arise from a traumatic experience, but also interesting at the same time because different people have their own unique fears. For example, some people have fear of heights but I have totally no issues with it. Hehe!

I used to be very afraid of darkness when I was young. To be honest, I wasn't sure how this fear came about, but I knew I was very uncomfortable when left alone in the darkness, be it walking in dimly-lit streets at night or even just going into a dark room. Maybe I was someone who isn't able to accept uncertainty, and in darkness, I wasn't able to see what was coming next, and hence, there is a feeling of anxiety. As I grew up, this wasn't an issue anymore. And interestingly, I didn't know how I overcame this fear. I just did it naturally - maybe it was the military service or maybe it was just part of growing up and become braver.

These days, I am more afraid of getting into a major illness. I think as we become adults, we have dependents, commitments, loved ones, or even job responsibilities, the last thing that we want to happen would be to contract a major illness which would turn our lives as well as the lives of the people around us upside down. It would be quite depressing if I were to become a liability to people around me, e.g. needing them to take care of me permanently, or even support me financially if I couldn't work for an extended period of time, etc. Writing this thought actually scares me a little - because it reminded me of what happened to a colleague of mine this year. The colleague had a bad headache during work in office, was sent to hospital, slipped into coma, and passed away shortly after. Life can be so fragile these days.

On a lighter note, I am actually quite afraid of cockroaches. These little insects are quite scary looking and it's tough to catch them too. The worse part is, they fly as well. So I have used a lot of lemongrass fragrance and diffusers within my room and hopefully this keeps them and other insects away as much as possible.

So that's all for my sharing this week! Hope you enjoyed reading and let me know if you have any comments! Have a pleasant week ahead!