Weekend Engagement - We Were Young And Carefree

What part of yourself (personality, character traits/habits) have you left in the past but regret leaving there?

I recently went on a solo trip to Bangkok, Thailand, and it struck me that it has been ages since I travelled alone for leisure. The closest trips that I went "solo" in recent times were probably those work/business trips, but it's not 100% alone because we would link up with colleagues or overseas partners for parts of the journey. During that solo trip, I was reflecting how my mindset has changed now in my 30s, versus when I was back in my 20s.

When I was in my 20s, I was braver. I think this has two interpretations. The positive aspect of being brave meant that I was more courageous to take risks and try out new stuff. But the negative aspect of this would be I might be more reckless.

Using travelling as an example, I wouldn't think twice to go on solo adventures and see the world. But now, I have more considerations. I would think of people around me, whether arrangements have been made for my aging parents for example, whether I need to make arrangements for my work projects, etc. I think we were more carefree when we were younger, at least for me. We didn't have to worry about many commitments and responsibilities (and our parents were the ones worrying about them).

When I was in my 20s, I was more easy going. Similarly, there are both positive and negative aspects to this. The positive aspect is obvious. But the negative aspect of being the Mr Nice is that one becomes a people pleaser and sometimes you end up compromising too much, even at the expense of your own happiness. Being older now, I have learnt that you don't need the world to like you. Just be who you are, the people who accept you for who you are will always be around for you, and these are the true friends who go through thick and thin with you.

I would like to think I haven't changed much as a person overall, but we are inevitably shaped by our life experiences, and for my case, I have become more risk averse (due to having more commitments) and more self loving (after realising that there are many people in the world who wouldn't hesitate to take advantage of people pleasers). I don't regret leaving these traits, as I believe there is always a right time for different personalities. I have lived through 20s the best way I possibly could, and 30s is another new chapter to experience.

To end off, this was the hotel pool during my recent trip, this was where I spent most of my mornings, chilling on the deck chairs after a hearty breakfast, catching up on stuff on my phone, and getting some sun in my trunks. I probably wouldn't imagine myself wasting spending time at the hotel pool ten years ago, as my younger self would probably be using the precious time to explore the foreign city as much as possible. But as long as we are living in the moment and we are happy, nothing else matters. :)