I Am #AliveAndThriving Today! || #IAmAliveChallenge || Daily Off-Grid Jungle Journal Entry: Day #595 - Major Issues Publishing Posts, and Healing Still in Process - GaiaYoga Gardens, Lower Puna, Far East Big Island, Hawai'i - Thursday, March 14, 2024

I live naked and barefooted, very close to Earth and Nature, in an 18-acre, off-grid, clothing-optional, food-forest intentional community (GaiaYoga Gardens), way out in the jungles of Lower Puna, far East Big Island, Hawai'i, and I have for more than 5 years now. Although there are many challenges, I love my life, and I'm immensely grateful to live where and how I do, on my own terms! I would not want to live any other way! 😁🙏💚⚡💥🔥✴️✳️❇️👣🌱✨🤙

Warm greetings all! 😁🙏💚✨🤙

Two times this week, Tuesday and yesterday, Thursday, I experienced major and very frustrsting issues publishing these posts via PeakD and PeakD Beta. It was also quite stressful because I was having these issues very close to the 2PM cutoff (when Hive's UTC changes from one day to another in my time zone).

Yesterday it was compounded because I had accidentally messed up my image formatting, so I had to delete and then upload most of my photos again, so with the publishing problems, I came within 2-3 minutes of failing to publish my post on time. And then when I thought to check my profile, I saw yet again that my post did publish, but got published in multiples. Double ugh. Very not cool. I'm realizing that I can't try to publish these posts so close to the cutoff time, especially with these ridiculous issues that I've been experiencing.

Another recent challenging issue, in another domain, was that the other night, when I was sitting next to the fire, and yesterday during the community NVC meeting in the Hot Seat Game (from Authentic Relating Games), it was hit home to me that I still do have some healing to do, as certain experiences triggered a numbness in my heart again, which caused my heart sun to go out, or at least strongly dim, and my heart to close. It's just about two weeks ago today, Friday, that I shifted, and my heart sun shined strong again.

So yeah, while I did apparently have a major breakthrough in healing my broken heart, the process is not yet complete, and there is more to do, as certain experiences, usually around what certain women say or do (not even directly related to me), trigger numbness in my heart, which then begins the process of my heart light going out, and my heart closing again. That's very problematic indeed in and of itself, but it also causes my inner masculine electric fire to strongly weaken too, which directly affects my experiences with women, and not in a good way.

Although I was planning to go out with people for Sunday Funday, to go dance, go to our beloved clothing-optional beach (Kehena), and the Lawn afterward, with the above-mentioned experiences that now does not seem likely. So it looks like I'll be spending yet another Sunday in self-imposed aloneness, mostly focusing on Hive I imagine. I feel so close to what I want, and yet so far, as well. Sigh. It's wild to me how quickly things can change, in both a positive and a negative direction.

Yesterday, Thursday, after the Hot Seat Game in the NVC meeting, and the stressful the frustrating time I had trying to publish the last iteration of this post, I left the Flow House close to 3PM, after wrapping up things on Hive for a bit, putting my focus first on getting the new SIM card to work with our mobile-network router. This process did not go well a few days ago when I tried it last. There was quite a lot of urgency to get the new SIM working, as the old SIM (which was for another mobile network) was going to stop working pretty much at any moment, so I had to make sure that our community didn't lose internet connection. Very thankfully, and surprisingly, the second time I swapped out the SIM cards, and powered the router back up, everything worked as it should. Upon testing from my laptop, I also noticed that the download speeds were much better, and much more consistently, than on the previous network, which was a very pleasant surprise.

Finishing with the internet work so quickly meant that I could go meet up with some people that had agreed to do some work in the fenced garden, which is what I wanted to do in the first place, before the urgent internet issue had to be addressed. We didn't actually end up getting any work done, but I did give the people who showed up, Harmony, Onyx, and Eyeza, a tour of the garden and the various important plants there, which was nice. We also ended up sharing some tobacco and mixed herbs, smoked out of a papaya-leaf stem (a pipepaya), which was also enjoyable. I gave them a short tour of my nursery after that, too. As we were leaving my nursery, Tiger Heart approached us carrying a tray of cups with gloriously-spiced cacao, as well as some really wonderful lemonade, that she had sweetly and unexpected prepared for us.

After enjoying our treats, I went to find Shane, who had wanted to talk with me. I found him in the Beduoin (the men's dorm), and we headed back to the Flow House to chat for a while. We talked about many things, but most notable was about his interest in the session work that I do with women. He asked me if I could teach him what I do, which I am willing to do. After talking with Shane, I headed back to the Landing to strain out kefir for my kefir-honey-cinnamon-cacao blend, and then back to the Flow House again, for my evening round of Hive tasks and catching up on notifications. This was one of the few times in the past two weeks when I didn't socialize or spend time with people in the evening (aside from talking with Shane), so I was able to devote several hours to Hive, allowing me to finally get fully caught up on my notifications for the first time all week. I finished on Hive just after 10:30PM, and after a short round of token management, I went to bed just after 11PM. I slept well for a few hours, then after getting up to pee, I couldn't get back to sleep the whole rest of the night, again. I found myself ruminating on, and trying to resolve, the heart numbness that I had been experiencing again. I finally just started on a round of toke management on Hive, and then I began this post.

I have a session with Omya (who is just over 5 months pregnant) today at 1PM, so I wanted to get this post done and published as soon as I could. I also want to make sure that I am able to publish it without the all-too-common issues I've been having lately. It's close to 8:45AM now, so a great time to end this post, so that I can get a few important Hive tasks done, go make my superfood fire coffee, and then prepare my space for Omya's session. I deeply appreciate you all so very much! Until tomorrow! Forward, onward, and upward, joyfully together! 😁 🙏 💚 ✨ 🤙

2024 Life Goals

1.) Heal my broken heart and embody a solid, healthy masculine. 

2.) Bring myself and my life back into balance, integration, and wholeness. 

3.) Do regular integral practices again. 

4.) Make my plant nursery beautiful again. 

5.) Prepare regular batches of my medicinal teas collected from the land again. 

6.) Begin learning relevant coding/programming languages to more fully contribute to the sovereignty-driven technologies where I am active, like Arch Linux, Hive, Qortal, DeSo, and Bastyon. 

7.) Get regular deep, integral energy-body-tantric work healing sessions with women flowing again.

8.) Live as an integral part of a juicy heart-resonant soul tribe community, with deep, coherent, mutual and shared passion, purpose, mission, love, warmth, care, sweetness, reverence, respect, aliveness, admiration, excitement, joy, playfulness, work, attraction, all-level connections, and relationships. 

9.) Make love with the women that I love every day.

All photos were taken with my Motorola G Power Android Phone.

Thank you all so much who have helped me get to where I am today, and allowing me to share more of the beauty and magic from my life and my world with you, and for your continuous appreciation and support! I am truly deeply grateful! 😁🙏💚✨🤙

If you'd like to find me on other alternative platforms where I have accounts (I spend most of my time here on Hive), click on this signature image below to go to my LinkTree page.

If you'd like to send me a BTC Lighting Tip (made possible by the fantastic work of brianoflondon on @v4vapp), just scan the QR image below. 👇

Signature image created by @doze, and the dividers made by @thepeakstudio, with all tweaked to their present form by me.